Empty

I roll myself down the hill

Hoping the speed will numb me

Threw my talisman in the river

As ritualistic disposal, keeping

An inaccessibly-sanctified

Virtual perfection of it

My addiction is to suffering

Once joy is not enough

Reach the top feeling empty

Hate my finally-found gold

Because it steals from me

The bless of madly being

Always going somewhere

Having no more tears to cry

I don't live in constant pain

I'm contemplated with intervals

So that I'll never be used to it