Hate me

 (written in 17/10/18)

Hate me, I bleed you when I'm blind

Kick me, I fancy being hurt

Yesterday I set myself gods to idolize 

Today I look around at huge mirrors

I painted them with the most

Shiny fluorescent colors

But now my own shadows

Equalize our surroundings

Papa was fucking witches

Mama wore a crown of spikes

And I take over all this dirt

My love is a selfish pseudo sacrifice

So I pray a prayer to make me rot slowly

The true phoney believes its deceit

A truly damaged brain forgets everything it learns 

Punch me, I need to stay like the victim

Break my heart and legs, all I need is an excuse

Yesterday I tried harder than Japanese boys

Today I hold the luxury of letting myself go

Look deep into my intense little eyes

And spit over the despair of these almost-tears

Observe the precision of my bloody stingy pain

This time it is for real 

This time, nothing to hold 

Judge me when I vomit abusive honesty

Or emphasize my love by despising all the rest

I built a delusive castle

So rob my reasons to deny my depart

Yesterday I was wearing glasses of sanctification

Today the dust inside me clogs all my holes
And can not see anything but a blur

Underestimate my unsophisticated words of true

So that you remain on a fake shelf

Yesterday my golden path distracted me enough
Today, I search strategies for abandonment
Crucify this inner whore, who lurks here inside
Burning her down to sticky ashes
She is summoned by traits